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The Awful Truth Behind Bullying By Tati Gumbs
Chapter 1: What is bullying
Bullying is something really bad you don’t want to be a part of. Bullying someone or getting bullied could really hurt someone’s feelings. If you don’t know what bullying is, I'm about to tell you. A fact that I got from www.stopbullying.gov is that “Bullying is unwanted , aggressive behavior amoung school aged children that involves a real or percevied power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time.” Another fact that I got from www.scholatic.com is that “Unfortunately, teasing is often a part of growing up- almost every child experinces it.” Also from my experience is that I have been teased at one point in my life so I will have agree with this fact and all of them too. This fact I found on www.scholastic.com is that, “with girls, bullying is often subtle and indirect, says Racheal Simmons, author of Odd Girl out: The hidden culture of Aggression in girls. Instead of snatching a toy from another child, a young girl might say, “Give me that toy or I won’t be your friend .” Older girls can be mean without saying a word: by telling other girls not to be friends with particular girl or girls, giving her the silent treatment , rolling their eyes, or making rude noises.” According to http://www.kzoo.edu is that “A bullying is a person who purposely tries to hurt others by: Making them feel uncomfortable , hurting them by kicking , hitting, and etc. Name calling and spreading nasty rumors.
There are many different types of bullying that can be experienced by children and adults alike, some are obvious to spot while others can be more subtle. The different types of bullying that we look at below are some of the ways that bullying could be happening. I personally interviewed Jaiden who is in my class and here is what she said: Q: How do you feel about bullying? A: “ I don’t think it’s the right thing to do. I think it’s unfair to people , they don't deserve to get bullied.” Q: What is bullying to you? A: “ Bullying is hurting someone and taking all your anger out on someone else for whatever reason. Consistently teasing or making fun of someone.” I interviewed another person named Rebecca who is also in my class and she said: Q:How do you feel about bullying?
people are hurt”.
A: “ I feel that people only bully to feel joy when
Q: What is bullying to you? A: “ Bullying to me is someone that hurts someone else. They need to hurt someone to feel good about them.”
Physical bullying-
Types of bullying:
Physical bullying includes hitting, kicking, tripping, pinching and pushing or damaging property. Physical bullying causes both short term and long term damage. Over 60,000 children every year are admitted to emergency care in Australia because of physical bullying.
Verbal bullyingVerbal bullying includes name calling, insults, teasing, intimidation, homophobic or racist remarks, or verbal abuse. While verbal bullying can start off harmless, it can escalate to levels which start affecting the individual target. Keep reading in this section for techniques to deal with verbal bullying.
Social bullyingSocial bullying, sometimes referred to as covert bullying, is often harder to recognise and can be carried out behind the bullied person's back. It is designed to harm someone's social reputation and/or cause humiliation. Social bullying includes: ● ● ● ● ● ●
lying and spreading rumours negative facial or physical gestures, menacing or contemptuous looks playing nasty jokes to embarrass and humiliate mimicking unkindly encouraging others to socially exclude someone damaging someone's social reputation or social acceptance.
Cyber bullying-
Cyber bullying can be overt or covert bullying behaviours using digital technologies, including hardware such as computers and smartphones, and software such as social media, instant messaging, texts, websites and other online platforms. Cyber bullying can happen at any time. It can be in public or in private and sometimes only known to the target and the person bullying. Cyber bullying can include: ● ● ● ●
Abusive or hurtful texts emails or posts, images or videos Deliberately excluding others online Nasty gossip or rumours Imitating others online or using their log-in
www.ncab.org.au
Chapter 2: websites to avoid
I think getting bullied on a website is a problem because getting bullied can cause a really big problem like suicide or cutting A lot of innocent teasing happens on facebook and via text messaging.(google classroom). According to http://www.momsteam.com the main three websites that people get bullied are: ask .. fm, imstagram, and facebook. Even little kids have been known to hack into CLUB PENGUIN to sabotage each other’s game. Another fact according to http://www.momsteam.com is that social media sites are on of the leading places the pre-teens and teens experience bullying , wheter they are being bullied, bullying someone or whitnessing it. Something I also found on http://www.momsteam.com is that with the adven of apps like facebook, snapchat, twitter,etc,cyberbullying is becoming prevalent then ever. Everyday there are over 150,000 kids nationwide who stay home from school because they have been bullied; and it seem there is a child in the news that has committed suicide because they were bullied, which is one too many. I think this is something everybody should know because it is very important to have people stay away from websites like these so people don’t get hurt.According to http://www.puresight.comHere is a story of a girl who has been bullied on a website:
Sarah Lynn Butler 1997-2009
Sarah Lynn Butler, a seventh grader from Hardy, Arkansas, committed suicide on September 26, 2009. Sarah, who had just been voted Queen for her upcoming Fall Festival, was teased at school, and later on received bullying messages on her MySpace page. Sarah’s mother says she often checked her MySpace page to make sure there wasn't anything inappropriate being sent or received, and she noticed that she was getting some bad messages about rumors at school saying she was a slut , and talked to her about it. But then Sarah removed her from her list of friends and she was no longer able to read her page. On the morning of her suicide, Sarah stayed home while her family was out, and logged on to her MySpace page. The last message she read said that she was
easily forgotten, and that she was just a stupid little naive girl and nobody would miss her. When her parents returned home they found that Sarah had hanged herself. She left a suicide note that said she couldn't handle what others were saying about her.
Chapter 3:Bullying at school
Have you ever wondered what is happening at school or why your child is getting bullied at school? Well, you're about to find out. I found out that bullying at school has happened a lot. According to www.dosomething.org , 1 in 10 students drop out of school because of repeated bullying. In my opinion that is 1 too many students that are dropping out of school because of bullying, it needs to stop. At some schools only 16% of staff believed that students have been bullied. Also 20% of high school students said they had thoughts about committing suicide in the 12 past months in 2011 at school. That is not good. 71% of teachers said they intervened a bullying incident. Also, 25% of bullied students said that teachers intervened a bullying incidents. Lets just say that the kids that bully the students probably have something going on at home or some place else, and their trying to take their frustration out on a kid. Another possibility could be that they are bullying kids to try and impress their friends. Here is a story of a person who got bullied: “ I was bullied pretty badly in high school. There was one kid in particular who would try to make me feel inferior in every way he knew how. For example, he would throw stuff at me constantly, flick me in the head, punch me, wipe whatever he picked out his nose on my shirt, call me ugly and stupid, mock me and of course – tell me he would beat me up if I ever fought back. It was like his daily mission. And it was my daily mission to just get through the day. What can I say, it made my world very small because that was my sole focus – just surviving. Everything else fell by the wayside. Unfortunately, that included any form of social life. So not only was my world tiny. It was very lonely. Looking back to that time – which was about 11 years ago – my biggest mistake was not bringing anyone into that world of mine. I was too proud (and embarrassed) to get help. I would rather not face the fact that I needed help because in my mind, that would mean that the bully won. It would also mean that I was weak. Let me just say this – bullying someone is a weak choice. The only reason they come after you is because they think you won’t do anything about it. Does that make anyone strong? Absolutely not. Be stronger – reach out to a parent, a teacher or friend. Anybody. Simply admit that you are struggling and need help”. http://www.pacerteensagainstbullying.org
One fact that i got from www.dosomething.org is that “About 75% of students
admit they have visted a website bashing another student. One other fact that I got from cyberbullying.org is that “
17% of american students report being bullied 2 to 3 times a month or more within the school trimester.” That is a really big number. I think that this is very important
to learn about what happens at school because not every kids tells their parents what is happening at school and not all the teachers tell what is going on at school to the kids parent.
Chapter 4:What could start bullying
Have you ever wondered what makes kids bullying other kids? According to www.scholastic.com , “if children experience put-downs or physical punishment at home or in school and if they see emotional and psychological abuse go unchallenged, they believe this behavior is acceptable”. Another fact according to www.scholastic.com , children learn bullying behavior from older children, from adults, and television. Here is another fact according to www.stompoutbullying.org is that a common reasin that a kid is bullying is because he/she lacks attention from a parent at home and lashes out atother for attention. Another fact according to http://eschooltoday.com is that some young people are bullied for no particular reason, but sometimes it’s because the are different in some way-perhaps it’s the colour of their skin , the way they talk, their size or their name. Also another fact according to http://ikeepsafe.org , Most research studying young people and cyberbullying tracks children ages 9-18. But cyber bullying starts as soon as a kid starts using the internet for social networking blogs,etc,as soon they feel they can use the technology unsupervised. Here is some facts of what would start bullying:
How Does Bullying Start?: The Parents
When it comes to bullying, a lot of people blame parents first . A lot of the time, the parents are
not connected with their children as much as they should be. Sometimes a person begins to bully others because of their situation within their household. They may come from a single parent home or their parents may have just gotten a divorce. In other instances, a person may live in a poor neighborhood and their parents or guardians may not be handling the responsibility of being a parent in a way that they should. A lot of the time, being a bully is a cry for help. A lot of people find this difficult to believe, but there is a reason why one person will target another and choose to bully them .
How Does Bullying Start?: The Home Life There are many neighborhoods all around the globe that have a bad reputation. If a person comes from a place where everything is negative, and there is nothing positive to set in their mind, this could lead to a series of problems, which includes bullying . Sometimes the parent or
guardian cannot afford to live in a neighborhood where it is quiet and upscale. As far as children are concerned, they are creatures of habit and learn from the things that they see. If they are
not instilled with morals, goals, and set on the correct path at a young age, this could be a recipe for disaster later on in their life.
How Does Bullying Start?: Neglect Neglect is one of the primary reasons a child begins the bullying cycle. In this situation, a child is being a bully because they want attention. They want someone to acknowledge them. Instead of telling someone about what is going on within their home, they decide to use bullying as a form to act out. If this situation is not caught and acknowledged, it may take a while to stop this
bullying process . Sometimes parents or guardians work long hours to provide a nice place to live for their children. In doing this, they may never be home or never have time for the child. This could cause a child to find the love and affection elsewhere, which is usually from the wrong crowd of role models.
( http://nobullying.com )
Chapter 5: How to help stop bullying
Have you ever wanted to try and stop bullying and you don't know how to, well I'm about to tell you. According to Google . , Stop and think before you say or do something that could hurt someone. If you feel like being mean to someone, find something else to do… Talk to an adult you trust. Keep in mind that everyone is different. If you think you have bullied someone in the past apologize to them. Another fact according to me, Tati is that you can try and stay on the positive side of everything and if you have something mean to say don’t say anything at all. Look the bully in the eye and tell him or her to stop. If a bully is teasing you in a way you don't like, insulting you, or physically threatening you, sometimes eye contact and a calm, clear "no" is the right way to defuse the situation. Tell the bully that you are not OK with the treatment you're receiving, and make it clear that it has to end immediately. ● If it's appropriate, try to use laughter to lighten the tension. Bullies usually try to get a rise out of the person they're bullying, so if you show the person [1] your skin is too thick for that, he or she may give up and leave you alone. ● Don't raise your voice when you're telling the bully to stop. This could provoke the bully to keep teasing you to get an even stronger reaction. ( http://www.wikihow.com ) “When she was just 15, Cati founded her organization Cati Cares as a way to reach out to other teens about Internet safety and how teens can join together to stop cyberbullying. Through her organization, Cati offers advice, a safe haven, and tips to stay safe and stop the vicious trend of cyberbullying. Cati believes that “When we stand together, we can change the world.” ( http://www.likeabossgirls.com ) I hope that this gives you some reasons of how to help stop bullying even if you are getting bullied or you see someone getting bullied you cans still try to prevent it. Here is a story of a boy who is trying to stop bullying:
“ Tyler Pascavis wants us to talk about bullying. Tyler, 18, is a native of Illinois, a lifetime member of the 4-H, and an anti-bullying advocate who believes that the only way we can put a stop to bullying is to bring it out in the open. At the school Tyler attended most of his life, Tyler found that the administration was not willing to admit there was a problem with bullying. A high-level school administrator once stated that bullying was not a problem at the school, so students who experienced bullying were left to suffer in silence. As someone who was bullied when he was young, and eventually someone who engaged in bullying himself, Tyler saw firsthand how staying silent on bullying could be as harmful as the bullying itself. Last April, Tyler had the opportunity to travel to Washington, DC for the 4-H National Conference. There, more than 200 teens from across the U.S., Canada and Puerto Rico, came together to address multiple issues that affect young people. Tyler was placed in a group whose focus was on bullying. Tyler found this experience to be transformational, and he returned home to Illinois with new resources, new friends, and a desire to start a conversation in his school on bullying. When Tyler was required to write a senior synthesis paper to present to the school board of directors on any topic, Tyler chose to focus his on bullying, writing about why it was his school’s responsibility to address bullying, and making recommendations for specific actions the administration should take. He felt that “no matter who you are, you need to accept people for who they are, and you need to love them, even if it’s difficult, and even if they don’t hold the same views.” In particular, Tyler wants there to be a stronger focus on not just victims of bullying, but the people who bully too. He believes that schools must work with students and teachers to build a community where everyone is accepted. “When someone bullies, it’s because he or she is looking for acceptance, and without that acceptance, he tries to find his worth in causing pain to others. We need to help these students also see they are loved.” Some members of the board listened, some were upset, but overall Tyler feels that the presentation had a positive impact. He feels that people at his school are finally empowered to talk about bullying—“the most important thing is to get the students and teachers talking about it, because that’s how change will happen.” Now Tyler is looking to the future
and how he can be a
positive role model to other youth
who are might face
bullying. As a freshman at Illinois
State University, Tyler has
received a Presidential Scholarship which includes a requirement that he complete community service hours in a local non-profit organization. Because of the important role 4-H played in his own life, Tyler will use his community service hour to volunteer as a youth leader in the local 4-H clubs and the 4-H afterschool program. “There are so many opportunities in 4-H, and there is always a place for a student to fit in, and find a place where he or she can belong.”